Seasons, seasons, seasons

It's that time of the year. Fall has come to northern Germany, and with it comes festivals, celebrations, recognitions of harvests had and to come. It may be no coincidence, then, that circuses are on the rise.



Grand Circus William presents the World of Circus. This white-tiger themed circus features plenty of non-white tigers and a trapeze artist that appears to be wearing a lucha libre mask soaring above a black stallion.

Thursday is family day.



Not to be outdone by Pankow (but who ever is, really?), Cricus Krone advertised near Alexanderplatz promises, uh, horse tricks. The oddly chosen landscape of hooves below the typeface creates the illusion of horses melting onto the stage.

But with fall comes something more important: fall fashion.

Ironic? You decide. Either way, H&M has opted to go the gritty, messianic route. Knowing how unkempt the fashion models appear, then, what of the mannequins? A night-time stroll by Humana near Alexanderplatz gives us an idea.

This man is all about swagger. From his posture, which is somewhere between tripping on the sidewalk and soliciting candy to children, to the, uh, cowskin background, everything is going wrong here. I would pay 35 Euros to send him back to the dairy farm he came creepin' out of. The milk jug of flowers isn't going to win any female mannequins over for him, either. Unless ...

They look something like this. One of them is so unbalanced she is literally using a ball of yarn to hold herself up. Cowman must induce fainting spells.

Then there's her, frozen in perpetual sneeze, scalp all messed up, catlady clothes draping off her emaciated torso.

One more for good measure.